Unhealed trauma is a heavy burden that many of us carry unknowingly. As a life coach, I cannot overstate how important it is to recognize and address unresolved traumas, as they can have a significant impact on our emotional well-being, communication, and relationships.
Triggers are a particularly difficult aspect of unresolved trauma. They can be external, such as sights, sounds, or circumstances, or internal, such as thoughts or feelings. When someone who has unresolved trauma comes into contact with a trigger, they may become overwhelmed by intense emotions and enter a fight, flight, or freeze response. This heightened emotional state can impair their ability to communicate effectively and accurately perceive the intentions of others.
Someone who has been traumatized in a car accident, for example, may feel anxious or panicked when they hear a car horn, even if it is not intended to be threatening. Even if the topic is innocuous, they may become defensive or withdrawn in conversation if driving or cars are mentioned.
Unhealed trauma can also affect our communication and relationships through misinterpretation. We may perceive a threat where none exists or overreact to perceived slights or criticisms when we project our unresolved feelings and fears onto situations or people.
Consider someone who has been verbally abused in a previous relationship. They may be overly sensitive to criticism from their partner, even if it is well-intended or constructive. They may interpret the comment as a personal attack and respond angrily or defensively, making open and honest communication difficult.
It is critical to recognize that triggers and misinterpretations caused by unhealed trauma can be harmful to relationships. When a loved one informs us that this is a common occurrence, it is critical that we take action and seek healing. It is not a criticism or an attack; rather, it is an expression of love and concern. Unresolved traumas can cause irreparable damage to the relationships we care about the most if left untreated.
Seeking professional assistance, such as therapy, is an important step toward healing unhealed traumas and developing healthier communication patterns. Meanwhile, those who interact with someone who has been traumatized should exercise patience, understanding, and empathy. Recognize that their communication difficulties may be the result of past experiences rather than malice. Remember that dealing with unresolved trauma is about more than just personal growth and healing; it is also about nurturing and preserving the relationships that give our lives meaning.
